Someone special got me a typewriter recently. I said it once a couple of months ago, I'd like to get a typewriter. And they listened and surprised me on my birthday.
I'm a big fan.
The post below came off the press the other day. Only a single edit or two while writing and a couple more while making it digital.
I changed one or two of the "most" to "some". When it came out it was raw. And I love that about the typewriter. Whatever comes out, comes out.
However raw though, it's polite to tidy things up. Raw doesn't always equal good. If I was to make a few more passes more would change. But I'll leave it for now. Something else will make its way out soon.
Saying "most" is aggressive, needed sometimes, not this time. I've got a tendency to think most people are the same as me. There it is again, "most". And sure, human nature is similar. But read a little about other places, other upbringings and you see where the differences come out.
Every time you hit a key on the typewriter you hear the clunk. You have to really get into it. Every keypress means something. No backspace baby. I've made several errors typing this paragraph but you don't see any of them because I can fix them as I go.
I like the mechanical aspect of it. I've been wanting to build more things with my hands and this feels like a small start.
What matters in the end are the words that come out. Whether they're typed on a typewriter, computer, handwritten or spoken.
Typing on the typewriter or writing long-hand (how I wrote the entire first draft of my novel) is calming. It's a slow dance. When I type on a keyboard my brain starts to vomit. I start writing two, three paragraphs ahead.
Typewriting is a new style for me.
I feel how a painter might feel switching from watercolour to oil or a programmer switching from one programming language to another. Excited by the novelty.
Let's see what else comes out.
What do you do when you don't have to do anything?
Oh yes finished a big project have you?
Come into some money have you?
A little lost are you?
Well well guess what... it's always been like that. You don't have to do anything. You don't have to do anything except die. You've never had to do anything except die. From the moment you were born. Most never get to feel this feeling. The feeling of nothing. Nothing at all. Instead of filling time with task after task, never stopping for air, never stopping to consider they might be like a dog chasing their own tail.
Not to worry though. The feeling is normal. The feeling of wonder is persistent consistent ever-present the scratch you can't itch.
Every time you start something, every time you finish, it'll be there. Embrace it. Absorb it. Use it. Be thankful for it. Buy it dinner. Laugh with it. Laugh at it. Laugh at yourself.
Ha! How often do you get such a chance?
A change to do nothing. A chance for a single hour to yourself?
An hour you can do whatever you want, create, dance, sing, walk, smell, lay on the floor, stare at the sky!
Cuddle up to the emptiness like the rump of a beautiful woman.
Let it caress you engulf your body your soul let it fill you with a newfound zest for life. Like the feeling you get after a steak dinner.
After all, if you can't do nothing, how do you expect to do anything? You see, that's why some don't end up doing anything not because they can't do anything but because they can't do nothing.
Enjoy the emptiness my son. For it is the essence of existence. If you can endure the emptiness, you can endure anything.